Ok, ok! You guys twisted my arm. I'll tell you the secret of making the "Surf & Turf Corker."
Pick up a couple bottles of a good brand champagne. One with a real cork, not the twist off brand. Take this home and prepare a real nice dinner for your sweetie. Put on some romantic music and pop the cork being careful not to destroy anything in the process and let the bubbles flow. Be sure to put the cork and the guard in a safe place. Make sure she has several glasses before dinner. Fill her glass more often.
Now serve that big dinner of baked trout or stuffed flounder, baked potatoe, Italian bread and tossed salad. Serve her several more glasses of that bubbly. (Remember we need at least two corks. One for backup.)
When you have finished eating, pour her another glass and take the dishes to the kitchen and clean up the mess. Make sure that both bottles are empty before you start to clean up.
Now take your time all the while singing some Italian tunes and keeping busy. By the time you have finished cleaning up, she should have passed out or fallen asleep on the couch. Your wide awake because you have been busy cleaning up.
Pick up your guards and corks and head for the garage. You need to drill or poke a 1/16 inch hole through the center of the cork and guard (guard is optional). Use at least 60 lb line (wire is optional), cut to about 12" and feed this thru the hole. At the flat end of the cork tie a loop in the line and place a split ring and 4/0 hook on the end. At the round end tie a 60 lb swivel or a loop whichever you prefer. Now if you use the guard you can place a trailer hook or dangle some stuff off the back. Some surgical tubing will also work. Add some pork rhine or fishbite and your in business.
Now sneak back inside, set the alarm for 4 AM, hit the rack and get up the next morning and try out that new "special" lure. She'll never miss you!
Good luck and be sure to put that ice bag and aspirin beside her before you leave!
