Garbo - that is hilarious. Do you write for a living?Best Truck on the beach is the one that belongs to your fishing buddy, you know the one that has no real sense, but has a lot of extra gas and bait money and wants to fit in with the rest of your crew......
Great gas mileage (you pay zero for gas)
Designated Driver (in case fishing is slow and you need to tie one on)
In case of beach over wash due to storm conditions (your truck is safe at home)
Rust (your truck has to drive through less salt water, wheel bearing maintenance/replacement costs kept to minimum)
Riding Shotgun (since you are not driving you can enjoy the scenery)