Good Blonde jokes
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Thread: Good Blonde jokes

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\r\n FL FISHERMAN\r\n \r\n
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Join Date
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Seattle, WA
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3,744
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\r\n Good Blonde jokes\r\n

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\r\n BLONDE LOGIC
\r\nTwo blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away.. Florida or the moon?"
\r\nThe other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ?????"
\r\n
\r\nCAR TROUBLE
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\r\nA blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.
\r\nAfter he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
\r\nShe says, "What\'s the story?"
\r\nHe replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
\r\nShe asks, "How often do I have to do that?"
\r\n
\r\nSPEEDING TICKET
\r\n
\r\nA police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
\r\nShe replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"
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\r\nRIVER WALK
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\r\nThere\'s this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"
\r\nThe second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."
\r\n
\r\nAT THE DOCTOR\'S OFFICE
\r\n
\r\nA gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor\'s office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
\r\n"Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."
\r\nThe redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed;
\r\nlikewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.
\r\nThe doctor said, "You\'re not really a redhead, are you?
\r\n"Well, no" she said, "I\'m actually a blonde."
\r\n"I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."
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\r\nKNITTING
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\r\nA highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
\r\nRealizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
\r\n"NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT\'S A SCARF!"
\r\n
\r\nBLONDE ON THE SUN
\r\nA Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
\r\nThe American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
\r\nThe Blonde said, "So what? We\'re going to be the first on the sun!"
\r\nThe Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can\'t land on the sun, you idiot! You\'ll burn up!" said the Russian.
\r\nTo which the Blonde replied, "We\'re not stupid, you know. We\'re going at night!"
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\r\nIN A VACUUM
\r\nA blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
\r\nShe thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"
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\r\nFINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!
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\r\nA girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named
\r\nRolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"
\r\n"HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They\'re watch dogs!"\r\n
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    \r\n Those were good\r\n

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    \r\n Two blondes are fishing on a river in Washington state and the game warden comes up to them and asks to see their fishing license and they go we dont have one the game warden says ill have to write you a ticket then but they blondes go we dont have hooks on our rods we have magnets so how are we fishing well this got the game warden interested so he says let me see so they reel up and sure enough they have magnets tied to their lines so he says i guess your arent fishing then so ill let you go he leaves and one blonde says to the other what an idiot doesnt he know theres steelhead in this river\r\n
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    \r\n A
    \r\nmarried couple was asleep when the phone rang at 2 in the morning.The
    \r\nvery blonde wife picked up the phone, listened a moment and said \'How
    \r\nshould I know, that\'s 200 miles from here!\' and hung up.
    \r\nThe husband said,
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  • \r\n'; // next/previous post info pn[389148] = "389188,389167"; pn[0] = ",389148"; pn[389167] = "389148,389177"; pn[389177] = "389167,389180"; pn[389180] = "389177,389188"; pn[389188] = "389180,389148"; // cached usernames pu[0] = guestphrase; pu[11729] = "FL FISHERMAN"; pu[12631] = "Orest"; pu[16996] = "New Kent Newbie"; pu[20934] = "Brooksobx"; pu[13603] = "RuddeDogg"; // -->

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    1. #1
      Join Date
      Sep 2002
      Location
      Seattle, WA
      Posts
      3,744

      Good Blonde jokes

      BLONDE LOGIC
      Two blondes living in Oklahoma were sitting on a bench talking, and one blonde says to the other, "Which do you think is farther away.. Florida or the moon?"
      The other blonde turns and says "Helloooooooooo, can you see Florida ?????"

      CAR TROUBLE

      A blonde pushes her BMW into a gas station. She tells the mechanic it died.
      After he works on it for a few minutes, it is idling smoothly.
      She says, "What's the story?"
      He replies, "Just crap in the carburetor"
      She asks, "How often do I have to do that?"

      SPEEDING TICKET

      A police officer stops a blonde for speeding and asks her very nicely if he could see her license.
      She replied in a huff, "I wish you guys would get your act together. Just yesterday you take away my license and then today you expect me to show it to you!"

      RIVER WALK

      There's this blonde out for a walk. She comes to a river and sees another blonde on the opposite bank. "Yoo-hoo!" she shouts, "How can I get to the other side?"
      The second blonde looks up the river then down the river and shouts back, "You ARE on the other side."

      AT THE DOCTOR'S OFFICE

      A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and said that her body hurt wherever she touched it.
      "Impossible!" says the doctor. "Show me."
      The redhead took her finger, pushed on her left shoulder and screamed, then she pushed her elbow and screamed even more. She pushed her knee and screamed;
      likewise she pushed her ankle and screamed. Everywhere she touched made her scream.
      The doctor said, "You're not really a redhead, are you?
      "Well, no" she said, "I'm actually a blonde."
      "I thought so," the doctor said. "Your finger is broken."

      KNITTING

      A highway patrolman pulled alongside a speeding car on the freeway. Glancing at the car, he was astounded to see that the blonde behind the wheel was knitting!
      Realizing that she was oblivious to his flashing lights and siren, the trooper cranked down his window, turned on his bullhorn and yelled, "PULL OVER!"
      "NO!" the blonde yelled back, "IT'S A SCARF!"

      BLONDE ON THE SUN
      A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day. The Russian said, "We were the first in space!"
      The American said, "We were the first on the moon!"
      The Blonde said, "So what? We're going to be the first on the sun!"
      The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads. "You can't land on the sun, you idiot! You'll burn up!" said the Russian.
      To which the Blonde replied, "We're not stupid, you know. We're going at night!"

      IN A VACUUM
      A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, "If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?"
      She thought for a time and then asked, "Is it on or off?"

      FINALLY, THE BLONDE JOKE TO END ALL BLONDE JOKES!

      A girl was visiting her blonde friend, who had acquired two new dogs, and asked her what their names were. The blonde responded by saying that one was named
      Rolex and one was named Timex. Her friend said, "Whoever heard of someone naming dogs like that?"
      "HELLLOOOOOOO......," answered the blond. "They're watch dogs!"

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